Every year on the episode before Super Bowl Sunday, Saturday Night Live runs a hilarious, fake commercial for Totino’s Pizza Rolls. Vanessa Bayer plays a long-suffering housewife who’s all about “feeding her hungry boys” while they’re watching the big game, and they totally couldn’t care less that she’s even there.
But that all changed in the latest version of the classic sketch that aired during the February 4 episode; it was the wife’s turn to have some fun! While she’s trying to explain to the camera that she’s got more Totino’s than ever before to feed the (terrible) guys, more and more people show up — including “Ted’s sister Sabine.” She’s stoked because she thinks there will be “more hands to help me make delicious Totino’s Pizza Rolls,” but can barely get the words out when she turns around and sees beautiful Kristen Stewart!
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Cue the most intense love affair of all time. Screw her “hungry guys” who don’t appreciate her; what is she hungry for? She’s got Sabine now, who’s showering her with affection and showing her what true love is all about. The hilarious sketch shows them touching hands as they put out pizza rolls, and gently caressing each other with pizza rolls in hand. Then it gets weirdly sexy! Vanessa and Kristen actually start making out in the kitchen and get fully naked to make out more on the countertop.
“My husband, he has his Totino’s. And you. You are my Totino,” Vanessa’s character tells Sabine in French. Amazing. Note that all this is happening about a foot away from the guys who are too engrossed in the game to ever notice them doing anything in the kitchen!
HollywoodLifers, tell us what you think about this sketch in the comments!
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